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Mary was invited to be conference speaker on a prestigious panel at a high profile conference.
Initially, she attempted to turn down the opportunity, but her manager forced her to go to represent the company.
Mary became a client of mine, and unfortunately, I see many women like Mary every month.
Why do competent, smart, and capable women turn down career-boosting opportunities like that? What solution can they use to overcome their fears in situations like this?
Males have similar issues with the spotlight. However, their reasons are entirely different than female clients which I will address in a later article.
When I asked Mary about her reluctance to be on the panel, she gave me one particular reason. She said, “There are rockstars on the panel who are all men; they are far more knowledgeable on the topic than me. They only invited me because I am a woman.”
I have heard countless variations of this response before.
This type of reaction assumes that knowledge and experience are the only factors for choosing a panelist or speaker and that any other reason for wanting them is invalid.
I couldn’t disagree more.
From my personal experience, I’ve noticed that conference organizers have two top priority goals which are: 1) To increase conference attendance and 2) To increase the number of attendees satisfaction of the event. They accomplish that by hosting good speakers.
What then, makes “a good speaker” in the eyes of a conference organizer?
You guessed it: Good speakers are those who bring people to the conference and keep them happy!
Unfortunately (or fortunately) in our culture, knowledge, and experience do not attract others, and they rarely make people happy. Therefore they cannot be used as a sole criterion for selecting conference speakers.
Other criteria for good a conference speaker are:
1. Celebrity Status: They are a known celebrity within or outside of their environment.
2. Controversial Stand: They have a polarizing and emotionally charged position.
3. Unique Point-of-View: They have a unique perspective on the topic.
4. Good Public Speakers: They know how to communicate their ideas well.
5. Unique Personal Story: They have a compelling personal story that engages the audience.
6. Relevant Topic: They speak about industry problems and provide unique solutions.
7. Big Following: They have a big following in social media or within their community.
8. Reputation: They have an excellent reputation within their community.
9. Strong Company Brand: They work for a big brand.
10. Diversity: They bring about the inclusion of minorities.
Notice, that knowledge, and experience is just one criterion out of the eleven that I’ve mentioned in this article. I know a lot of conference organizers; they would sacrifice knowledge and experience any day, for a speaker with any other quality on the list.
The fortunate part about being “a woman” is that you are given three of these criteria off the bat. As women, you already come with a unique point of view; you have a unique personal story, and you have diversity. However, this will not last for long because as time moves on, there will be more and more women speakers at conferences and you will lose your advantage as “a woman” if you do not use it.
Being a woman does not take away from any of the other criteria. You can be a woman, and you can be knowledgeable and an expert; you can be a celebrity, and you can have a significant following and have the support of a big brand. These qualities will only make you more desirable as a leader in the spotlight.
